I spent some time with parents from Harvest Hands during our monthly parent discussion group talking about things parents can do to encourage their kid to be aware of and examine a wide range of possible career options.
In between making kids pick up after themselves and breaking up sibling arguments, parents also need to help kids develop into happy, healthy productive adults. One area of particular importance (since it will determine whether your kid can be healthy and productive out of your house) is to help them discover and follow a career path.
If your kid is already on a career path (e.g., focused on going to college and working toward that end, has some consistent ways they talk about a particular job or career, already working on developing skills relevant for a career of interest), leave well enough alone. At the most, find ways to encourage their efforts. But, some kids aren’t really taking school seriously. Some kids don’t have a clear idea what they might like to do to support themselves.
What’s parents a parent to do.
Educate yourself about jobs and careers. The more you know about the range of jobs, skilled trades and careers, the better you will be able to help your kid consider a range of future career options. Find out what’s out there. It is surprising how many different kinds of jobs and careers there are in this big, wide country. A good place to start is the Bureau of Labor Statistics Occupation Outlook page (here is the Spanish version). This governmental agency tracks information on all aspects of all jobs. And, they also provide predictions on which jobs are likely to be in demand (and in decline) over the next 10-20 years.
Talk about different careers. Your kid doesn’t realize just how many kinds of jobs are out there. You can help them consider different potential future careers by pointing out different professions and jobs you notice as you go about your everyday lives. If your kid shows any interest, find out more about that job. It can be fun to go through different career possibilities on the Bureau of Labor Statistics web site to look at salaries, education and training and future prospects for interesting jobs. You want your kid to begin to have the idea that a career is something you are interested in doing AND have to work for. Don’t worry about being practical. Life will introduce that element all too soon. The goal is to encourage them to explore careers that might be interesting. You can even make it into a game. Get together as a family and have everyone pick out jobs they might want to have (and jobs they definitely DON’T want to have).
Take field trips. Find ways for your kid to see people going about their work. Explore a variety of jobs; everything from professional to industrial to highly skilled trades to independent businesses. These visits can be arranged as an actual destination or you can swing by places when traveling. Visit actual work places. While there, talk about what it would be like to do that job or have that career (e.g., what would be interesting, what would be a drag, how much they would make, what potential for challenges or advancement, how likely the job is to be around in 10 years, etc.). Again, you can find a lot of this information on the Bureau of Labor Statistics web site.
Be sure to visit college campuses; especially those in your own area. The campuses are often beautiful and kids will get the message: this is the place to be after you graduate from high school. You can even arrange to have someone take you on a brief tour. Visit classrooms, find a science lab, talk to someone in an area of interest for your kid, stop by the campus book store and eat in the student center. It never hurts to emphasize the value of education (and the coolness of college life).
Encourage the development of natural interests. Choosing a career will be based, in part, on your kid’s natural interests. Pay attention to their interests. Ask them about it. Find ways to help make it possible for them to pursue things they enjoy. Enthusiasm and interest is a good predictor of future success so keep an open mind. You never know where an interest will lead. Even if their interest is more of a hobby, there is still value in encouraging them. Something that starts out as a part of play can end up as a potential career. Many of the qualities kids show in pursuing a hobby (e.g., persistence, persevering in the face of frustration or failure, problem solving, developing expertise, enthusiasm, working hard to master the task, etc.) are the same ones your kid will need to be successful in a career or job. It is good practice (and you don’t have to force them to practice this). It will be important, though, for your kid to stick with a hobby or interest long enough to make significant progress and to develop real skills. If your kid jumps from one hobby to another once it gets difficult, you may need to focus on helping them develop more stick-to-it-ness (though not necessarily with that interest area). This would be a time to require them to develop a unique, personal skill (see Keep their options open section below).
Apprenticeships. Older adolescents can benefit from spending time helping out people in a career area of interest. Some places have formal structures for teens to work in the organization like internships or apprenticeships. Some places allow kids to volunteer. You may know someone skilled in just the area your kid has an interest who will let them help out. Look for opportunities for your kid to get their hands dirty (figurative or literally) in a career area of interest.
Keep their options open. Encourage your kid to have more than one interest. Make sure there is a mix of personal interest and things that result in personal growth and improvement. Finding an activity that fulfills both is ideal. But not every interest translates well into a career. Sometimes, you have a job to make money and you have our own personal interests for personal fulfillment. If your kid doesn’t (or won’t) find an interest that requires skill development, pick something for them. Some of the fairly traditional personal growth activities include learning to play a musical instrument, dance, gymnastics, martial arts, painting, drawing, sculpting, skateboarding, computer programming (or hacking). That’s not to say that some personal growth activities could also turn into potential employment opportunities like learning to build things, wire things for electricity, set up integrated home audio and video systems, repair or program computers, repair engines and landscape or garden. These latter set of “anchoring” skills are ones your kid could use to support themselves as they pursue other interests or if the economy takes a dive.
Emphasize education. If your kid doesn’t know for sure what they are going to do, education is the best fall back. Kids whose parents expect them to go to college, kids whose parents tell them they are required to go to college, kids whose parents emphasize education and learning, kids who hang around kids who are going to college become kids who are more likely to go to college. Kids who go to college earn more and have greater employment flexibility in uncertain economic times. Education is the best bet for employment opportunity.
However, not all college education is equal. Some provide no greater opportunity for employment than if your kid spent the same time (and considerably less money) developing a skilled trade or pursuing an entrepreneurial venture; especially if they are really interested in non-college degree careers. If you have one of these kids, emphasize education but be sure to emphasize learning basic skills (which, these days are pretty advanced) regardless of whether they think they are going to college; ESPECIALLY if they are not planning on getting a college degree. They need to know how to write well, do math at the level of Algebra II and have some background in the biological and social sciences (because things are changing so fast). Finally, they will need to have a command of technology (and that doesn’t mean knowing how to update their social media account!). From this point forward, everyone will have to be a lifelong learner whether or not they have a college degree.
Work, pay and lifestyle. Kids need to know the connection between working, income and their standard of living. While personal interest is an important factor in pursuing a career preference, making an adequate living is also usually high on the list. It is useful for your kid to understand the connection between jobs, salary and what is affordable. While it is important to tread lightly on this topic to avoid squashing legitimate interests, some gentle discussion about the lifestyle that goes with a particular career might end up increasing or decreasing their interest. This is particularly important if your kid isn’t very ambitious. “I don’t care about having a lot of stuff anyway.” This might be the time to have them begin to manage their own expenses to see just how far (not) money goes.
The other side of this is the expectation some kids have that if they don’t make $100K a year starting out they won’t be able to get by. You will probably need to help them understand about career development where you start out at an entry level and build across time through continued skill building and promotions. That is particularly true of you provide them with a substantially higher standard of living than they can expect when they begin their careers.
Teach important work habits. In addition to knowing how to identify career goals and to work toward accomplishing them, they also need a set of skills that will help them to succeed in the 21st century work place. Work ethic, creativity, leadership, communication, flexibility and patience are just a few of the qualities they will need to show regardless of the specific career path they take. (The identification of these skills and ways you can help your kid develop them were the focus of a previous series of my column There’s A Stranger In My House for the Brentwood Home Page).
Helping your kid find or pursue a fulfilling career is a subtle but important parenting responsibility. Start early and address it often.
